One Weird Confusing Fucked-Up Family
by Mumei Mu
Summary: You always hear from people that they have weird or confusing family...Well, Naruto just beat you with his weird and confusing family because of their complicating background, their complex and their willing to cross the taboo line. Why can't he just have a normal sane family? Having this many mothers and sisters really make it so weird, confusing and fucked-up.


**I present you one of the latest story, One Weird Confusing Fucked-Up Family! A Naruto x X-over fanfic!**

**I don't know how many chapters this story is going to have but I know that it's going to be short, it's more like…Koma? Crack-ish? Yeah, it's gonna be weird and confusing.**

**Also I won't say what the characters look like because there's no OC…Until it's about the clothes. If you want to know who's from what, just check the list in bottom AN.**

**Characters might be OOC and there'll be some grammar error but I'm trying my best.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto and everything mentioned in this story.**

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**Prologue: The Weird Confusing Family**

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An alarm clock blaring loud with buzzing until Naruto snatch it up then throw it across the room with a annoying groan and it shatter on the wall. "Goddammit, every damn time right before the good part of ramen dream!" The blonde teenager grumbled to himself as he get out of his bed, rubbing his eyes and he barely get out of his room before he hear some arguing behind a door across the hallway from his room.

"JUST LET ME GO!" A voice screamed, "I WANNA GIVE HIM A MORNING BLOWJOB!"

"FUCK NO, IT SHOULD BE ME WHO WILL GIVE HIM ONE! HE WILL LIKE HIS FIRST BLOWJOB TO BE FROM ME BECAUSE I AM…" Another voice shouted back.

"NO, ME!"

"NO, ME, ME!" It sounds like there were more than two people behind the door and the blonde stare at the door for a while before he walk down the stairs with a twitching eyebrow.

"Damn bro-cons." Naruto muttered under his breath as he entered the kitchen, "But again, I don't know wh…"

"Ah, good morning, my little baby!" A voice chirped loudly to draw his attention to see an attractive buxom blonde woman in apron…And that's it, that's all she wears. "What breakfast do you want? Eggs? Cereal? Pancake?" She bend down to expose her sizeable cleavage with a wink, "Or your mama?" The blonde teenager was about to deadpan until a new voice shouted out.

"APHRODITE, YOU ARE NOT HIS MOTHER!" Athena suddenly appear…With only apron as the busty blonde woman glared at the said goddess, "I AM! I'M THE ONE WHO GIVE BIRTH TO HIM, NOT YOU!"

"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, YOU COW?!" Aphrodite shouted back with dirty glare, "I AM THE ONE WHO GAVE BIRTH TO HIM!"

"Mmm?" Shizuka Marikawa walk into the kitchen with innocent blink, "Why are you two arguing in morning?"

"They are fighting over who is my birth mother." Naruto deadpanned as if he was used to it.

"Oh, I wonder why they keep doing that…" Shizuka tilted her head with index finger on her chin, "I mean, I'm the one who give birth to you." At this moment, seven females walk in and heard her.

"No, silly, it's me." Robin Nico smiled at the ditzy woman.

"Nay, it is I." Centorea Shianus crossed arms under her bust with a huff.

"That would be me, his beloved mother." Sephie Michaela Deviluke replied with a sweet smile.

"Hmph, it's me." Irene Belserion shook her head with crossed arms.

"ME!" Etna said loudly with her hand up in air, "I am the real mother!"

"Fufu, you mean me?" Rias Gremory flick her hair over her shoulder, "After all, we know it's impossible for you to give birth to my son with this body." The loli overlord was about to retort but…

"HOLD IT YOU ALL!" Kushina Uzumaki stomped her foot down with a hard look, "EVERYONE KNOW THAT IT'S ME WHO DID! THEREFORE IT GIVE ME RIGHT TO FUCK NARU…"

"NO, IT'S ME!" The claimed mothers cut her off then they start fighting each other.

"…Not again…" Naruto sighed with deadpanned expression before he walk up to the cabinet and pour himself a bowl of cereal then walk out of the kitchen…Only to run into ten more female around his age.

"What happened?" Lindsay asked him innocently as she peek over his head at the fighting in kitchen, "What are they fighting over?"

"Over whoever is my real mother." He replied flatly.

"It's Athena, of course!" Clara spoke with hands on her hip, "I know that because you're my twin brother…"

"But he's my brother, not yours." Lindsay turned her head to her with a puzzling blink, "I mean, I'm his twin sister…"

"No, silly girl." Noan Saotome smiled at the bombshell, "He's not your brother, he's my little brother and Kanon's older brother."

"Yeah!" Kanon Saotome nodded.

"No, he is mine!" Himiko Toga chirped, "After all, we share same blood!"

"No, that would be I, his rightful elder sister." Erza Scarlet said stoically.

"Um, no, it's me." Silena Beauregard said with slightly raised hand.

"…Me…" Rei Ayanami said expressionless, "He is…My brother…"

"Nah, he's my big bro." Momo Belia Deviluke smiled, "So is his big…"

"HEY, HE IS MY BROTHER, YOU CRAZY BITCHES!" Karin Uzumaki yelled and like the claimed mothers, they start fighting each other over whose is his sister.

"…I'm going to school now…" Naruto calmly walked out of a large house with flat expression, why do they have done that every damn morning?!

Normally, anyone would know who is part of their family but not in case because it's a very confusing situation…You see, Naruto have no memories of his past and when these women and teenager girls claimed to be his mother and-or sister, he immediately ask for DNA test like every normal person. The result? They all matched…Over thousand times and with over thousand doctors. To make it more confusing for him, everyone have proof that he grow up with them via pictures, videos and many more…And yet they all live together in same house…

And to drive Naruto crazy, it turn out that his 'sisters' and 'mothers' have son-or-brother complex and would try to cross the taboo line every damn day, not caring about the society and that's really fucked up in his book.

"…And why the hell were everyone wearing naked apron?!" The blonde teenager blushed madly, trying to push all images out of his head.

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**And that end the prologue of OWCFF!**

**Here's the list of which characters come from…**

Kushina Uzumaki, Karin Uzumaki (Naruto)

Athena, Clara (Uchi no Musume ni Te o Dasu na! - Oyako Heroine Funtousu)

Rias Gremory (Highschool DXD)

Aphrodite, Silena Beauregard (Percy Jackson and The Olympians)

Irene Belserion, Erza Scarlet (Fairy Tail)

Centorea 'Cerea' Shianus (Daily Life With A Monster Girl)

Robin Nico (One Piece)

Shizuka Marikawa (Highschool of the Dead)

Etna (Disgaea)

Sephie Michaela Deviluke, Momo Belia Deviluke (To-Love-Ru)

Saotome Noan, Saotome Kanon (Saotome Shimai Ha Manga no Tame Nara!?)

Lindsay (Total Drama)

Rei Ayanami (Neon Genesis Evangelion)

Himiko Toga (My Hero Academia)

**Mmm, yup…So confusing and weird…I get no words for that…Really, I don't.**

**With this kind of family, how crazy can it get? Will they cross the line and jump him? What will Naruto do when it happen? What'll happen next? Let's find out in next chapter!**

**Anyway, I think that's all I can say for now. Thank you for your time to read it.**

**Please leave reviews and feedback here. The flames will be tossed out.**


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